Thoughts from years past
I reflect upon who I was a year ago, and am overjoyed at where God's leading me:
Dear Ruth,
The fear of finding yourself recklessly floating through life has always hindered your ability to do anything but that.
What?
In a sense of anxiety over performance and a fear of procrastination you had fallen into the trap of performing badly and identifying yourself as the ultimate procrastinator (see Amanda Bynes' procrastinator skit).
But it all comes down to this one thing: me. Myself. And, oh I'm not sure if you know this person: I.
Unless you fill your soul with a love for Jesus, the emptiness provokes a sense in you over time of total abandon or of wrestling worry. The focus becomes you. The performer is you. The end all and be all is you. And what happens when from within you don't find the perfect god you've manufactured yourself to be? What happens when this girl wakes up in the morning, totally disappointed by her reality, her prior success. What happens when she creates her own worth, yet her perspective of self is like Wall Street - ducking and diving between highs and lows. Unstable. Unassured. Unreal.
You see, you need Jesus. The creator of you established from the get go your worth. Your place in heaven. Your unchanging value. Your money, in the right hands is protected, invested, grown. Likewise your worth in the One who is the original artist of your life doesn't waiver. It is infinite.
An artist creates a piece of art to express something. Now post modern thought says that we can look at a piece of art and gleam what we want from it. And that's perfectly valid a statement, as we physically and mentally do this. But no matter what you want to gleam from it, the Artist's original purpose, thought or motivation for the image as a whole right down to the individual strokes of a brush or the moulding of a section of a clay statue is entirely theirs. You cannot take away the value that work has for them, nor can you invalidate their desires behind its production.
God is the artist, and you are the artwork. You can define yourself however you like - but know that your ultimate value and worth is seen in God's eyes and His eyes alone. The highest and most noble reasons for your existence was manifested by Him. Do not let post modern thought rob God of His right to love you and want to preserve His precious image of you.
Ruth - go forth and know that you're infinitely loved. And share this same truth with the world.
