Love Looks Different to the Lord

 Sometimes what glorifies God pisses other people off.

Let me rephrase that for the people who winced at the way I said it: sometimes the things God wants for us and through us leaves others with their knickers in a twist.

Let me rephrase that again: sometimes serving God annoys others.

I remember at my baptism (and possibly every other baptism I’ve been to) the pastor said “there’s a lot of sacrifice in a life of following Jesus.” They go on to paint this idea that there’s a lot of hardships, that there will be persecution at times. That people won’t get it when you life for God and honour Him with your choices. 

When I became a Christian 5 years ago, one of the people that pushed against me the most was my own mother. I think it was mostly that I had always had her as some wise guru in my life, and all of a sudden her advice did not match with the advice of God: to love without measure. 

I probably only lost one or two friends in my becoming a Christian, but only out of their discomfort that stemmed from what they believed me to believe (they were wrong). 

I, however, have grieved more friendships and connections from within the Christian community than without. I don’t think that’s what God ever intended. But it’s a result of human brokenness and simultaneously wanting the best for others.

By no means am I aiming to paint the church as a messed up community that no one should join (there’s a lot of nuance to this topic, but if you’ve ever attended therapy with another person, you’ll know that things get tough and tense before the breakthroughs happen. Church is a wholistic therapy session for body, mind, and soul. I’ll track with this another time), rather I am being clear that sometimes forks in the road happen and we (for whatever reason) have to take separate paths. 

It’s weird. It’s uncomfortable. Your decisions can honour God but upset a heart of someone who isn’t quite on the same wavelength with Him in regards to that theme or notion. At the end of the day, you have to find peace in knowing His will and surrendering to it.

I once left a relationship for this reason. And while I’m sure it was hurtful (for both of us) to experience that, it allows God to speak more clearly to us both. The tension between us eased and we can focus on His voice. 

I want to encourage those who make bold decisions for God and experience interpersonal setbacks because of them. Hang in there. God loves you, and those other people. When you love Him with all your heart, your love for others will flow. Sometimes that love looks like space. Sometimes it looks like a future glance across a room and a smile.

But in the end, God’s intention has always been to have you all in heaven smiling and hugging and being gorgeously at peace with one another. It’s His job to fix the brokenness in each of our hearts that cause conflict and friction here, and mended will bring in celebration and rejoicing there.